Okay, it wasn’t really a realization; rather, something about the day jogged my memory. Matt and I went to Disneyland for my birthday. His dad used to work there and we had a pair of free tickets, which is awesome because oh my lord how can anyone afford $90-something a ticket?!
The sun beat down, burning our scalps. The line for the Dole Pineapple Whip Floats was longer than some rides. And still, these are not the things that brought me the greatest unease. Rather, it’s how much I despise people.
By the way, Matt agrees. He was totally with me on this and we plotted the murder of many park attendant on Saturday.*
Don’t get me wrong. I love certain people. Certain people are awesome. But people en mass? No thank you. I’ll take a raincheck. I’d rather stay inside and commune with the peoples via the Internets.
And people in crowds are even worse. They bunch up. They don’t keep to the right on walkways. They roll over your toes with strollers. They stop in the middle of a path so you nearly run into their backs. They’re oblivious and clueless and completely obnoxious.
Now, I realize this makes me sound like a terrible person, but if you only knew how many conversations we overheard that were so wrought with douchebaggery, the participants would have won awards for their stellar performances. Hipsters everywhere. Dudes wearing shorts with loafers. I’m telling you, the world was out to get us this weekend by sending minions of the Dark Lord Obnoxious.
Am I ornery? Perhaps. Generally irritable? Could be. But tell me, how would you feel if you overheard some girl saying, “I like how my hair feels,” while running her fingers through it or if you heard the same girl say, “God, I hate everybody wearing shorts right now,” in the most stereotypically valley girl voice ever. Or the group of hipsters behind us in a line that loved the sound of their own voices so much they should just marry them already.
Did I mention the dude wearing shorts and loafers?
I’m not bitter or anything. But damn. People are annoying.
*Not really. We’re not the murdery type. That would require entirely too much effort.
Don’t let the weirdos get you down. Just turn ’em into characters. 😉
Heh, we still had fun 🙂 I think a guy that was wandering around the book fair last weekend could easily be a character. He approached everyone and said, “Magic mushrooms for an answer.” Yeah, I don’t know either lol
I don’t despise people (obviously) but sometimes I have to bite back my supermarket rage.
Supermarket rage. Yes, that’s exactly it. I like individual people, but you put them in a group and I get stabby 🙂
I think the worse of it was my anxiety in large groups. Its hard to navigate though the park without touching anyone or getting trapped in a non moving blob of people mass.
Also, wow my hair looked flat that day and you win all the wife points for “Dark Lord Obnoxious”.
Yes, the people that just stop in front of you and back up the entire pathway are what bugged me the most, because people then crowd up behind you.
I think your hair looked fine 🙂 And thanks hehe Still had fun anyway though, despite the weirdos hehe
Congrats on meeting your W1S1 goals 🙂
And well done for not massacring the whole of Disneyland, although you could have said it was research for a story and tried to get away with it like that.
Soon you’ll be able to get your revenge by pushing your stroller over other peoples feet. It’s what they are for. That and giving people a neat smack on the back of their legs.